What is the key to self esteem? Sometimes you don’t feel good about yourself or simply wants to feel better than you do, you may end up trying to change one area of your life. At the same time, you may try to change a number of areas of their life.
When this happens, someone is likely to believe that they will feel better about themselves, and that their value as a person will increase, once they have achieved certain things. Therefore, what is going on within them will change by changing what is going on without.
One could have the desire to transform how they look, which could be seen as something that will take place by going to the gym. In their mind, they may have a clear idea about how they need to look in order to feel more at ease with who they are.
So, for a number of hours each week, they will be in the gym working towards their ideal body. Yet even when they are not there, they could still spend hours preparing the right food to eat.
In other cases one could believe that they will change how they feel as soon as they have the right career or moved to a certain level within their current career. One could come across people who do what they themselves want to do and see how comfortable they are in their own skin.
This is then going to give them inspiration to add to their own motivation, thereby allowing them to keep going even if they experience setbacks. Trying to achieve this could end up taking most of their time.
After achieving one of their goals, or even all of them, for instance, one could find that they finally feel good about themselves. The work that they put into one or a number of areas of their life will then have paid off.
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Conversely, what they may find is that they don’t feel any better, or that they only feel different for a short while. As a result of this, they might end up trying to change another area of their life, seeing this is the final piece of the puzzle.
Most times, it works. But then again, they might find that it wasn’t the answer that they were looking for. At this point they could take a step back and reflect on what is going on, or they could find something else to achieve.
If they do find something else, their attention will continue to be consumed by what will happen in the future, making it hard for them to embrace the present moment. The present moment will be painful but the future will very different.
What this shows is that it takes a lot of effort and energy to wear a mask; effort and energy that could be used more constructively. If someone doesn’t feel good about themselves and has rejected different parts of their being, it can be hard for them to understand how their life could be any different.
Fortunately, how they experience life can change through working through their own baggage. There is a strong chance that they are carrying trauma, and that this is what is making it hard for them to feel good and to be able to accept themselves.
In a country like Nigeria where everyone seem to focus on their individual challenge, it is difficult to get a chance from someone who could be in more stress. This explains that it is key to develop self love. The importance of this can’t be overemphasized.
Building self esteem is a major milestone to self actualization and this is the way to breakthrough from within.